By Jessica Clipperton, Friend & Former Dragonfly Coach
Here’s the thing, when I find myself in these situations, I don’t want to stay there. So to help get myself out of it, I trace my thoughts. That’s right. I stop, think back to when my mood changed and consider the thoughts that are always running in the back of my mind. Kind of like those messages you get from your iPhone that tell you so-and-so app has been running in the background and asks if you would like to always allow it. The answer is NO. I think back to when the disappointment hit and tie it to the corresponding thought that caused it.
Notice what you’ve been thinking, name it, and choose to think something different. Our outward appearance, mood, and behaviors always have a root. Finding the root will help you turn it around. I recently took a class on Pre & Postnatal Coaching. The textbook said, “Inner chatter is a powerful driving force that can deeply influence how people view themselves and even how they behave.” Which of your thoughts are giving you trouble? Which thoughts do you need to listen to more?
After all, what you think about and how you feel is your choice. No one can make you dwell on certain thoughts. No one can make you feel a certain way without your permission. It’s your choice. Yes, disappointing things happen. People can put thoughts in our head or hurt our feelings but how we respond is our choice.
Noticing and naming teaches us to “catch” our thoughts. Don’t judge yourself, don’t get mad or discouraged, simply notice what it is. Become aware of your thoughts and choose to think about something different. Instead of judging yourself because of your thoughts or getting down about something, refute and reframe the thought then replace it with a more positive outlook.
What we think affects how we live—how we’ll eat, spend our time, engage in relationships, and more. How we believe and talk to ourselves will change our thinking and our emotions WILL follow.
Are you ready to take notice?